Dunk Contest Disaster

Like the end of my first relationship with a rude and swift stomach punch, NBA Dunk Contest ended abruptly and without emotion. Boos echoed down from the “Smoothie Center” rafters, as the players stood awkwardly around Nick Cannon. This was not the ending that anyone was looking for to fire them up before heading out on a Saturday evening.

We can all agree the ending of the Dunk Contest was a giant, horrific scab on the face of an otherwise successful first All-Star Saturday for the new NBA commissioner, Adam Silver. The event has been under scrutiny, as interest in the dunk contest seems to rise and fall yearly. Dunk Contest used to be the pinnacle of the weekend. Winning it absolutely meant something for the winner and his team. At its best, winning the Dunk Contest cemented a legacy for the individual. It was a competitive event showcasing athleticism that doubled as bragging rights for your team.

But that's like your Grandpa telling you a story, 'Back in my day, the dunk contest meant something.' Superstars today don’t feel the same pressure Dominique Wilkins and Michael Jordan felt to win the award, and coupled with the fact it is harder now to impress people with dunks than it was in the early 90's. An NBA player cannot use the same dunk that someone else did in years prior. That unspoken rule did not apply 25 years ago. Twice, Jordan won the contest with his own variation of the free throw line dunk. Last year, former New York Knicks forward James White could have done his between the legs dunk from the free throw line and still lost. Most of the dunks that happen in today’s event, would seem borderline incomprehensible when this event was super in its heyday. Dunk creativity has skyrocketed, and this new reality has definitely hurt how people perceive today's contest. Often negatively.

Another common knock on the All-Star weekend is how buddy-buddy the league has gotten, a perfect example of how AAU has improved league camaraderie while simultaneously making the pundits argue the game has gone soft. Whatever the matter, there is no denying that tempers don’t flare and bodies don’t fly quite like they did in the 80’s and 90’s. When you talk to any NBA fan, it was those decades seeming to warrant the most amount of respect from the casual fan. Fair or unfair, that is the level of nasty competitiveness, people seem to be looking for.

For All-Star Weekend, NBA decided to add more of a competitive flair to things in an attempt to revive Saturday in an effort to pit the East vs. West. In a season that injuries have stolen players like Derrick Rose, Kobe Bryant and Russell Westbrook, the regular season thankfully been saved by the individual greatness of LeBron James and Kevin Durant. As the media has carefully orchestrated a way from these two friends to have bad blood, their fictional rivalry would serve as a perfect parallel for the new All-Star format. LeBron Vs. Durant. East vs. West.Whatever the case, it was clear to me the league is trying to bring back any semblance of bad blood to help boost ratings. And honestly, I am all on board for that plan. The new format did not bothering me one bit. In fact, I thought it was working. I found myself cheering a little harder then usual. But then the Dunk Contest happened....

The Freestyle round was different, but unique. I had not seen that before, and thankfully, they let the Eastern Conference team of Paul George, John Wall and Terrence Ross trot out there first. They were eloquent, barely missed any dunks, and put on a show. Did I have a problem with the way it was graded with three NBA legends holding up East or West? Yes, but at least for this part of the night, grading did not bring to question any doubt within the competition, because the East team showed up, and showed out.

Unfortunately, the end of the first round also is when the door can start to swing open to criticism. The grading system sucked, as my buddy Ryan texted me, “I want a mutha f$%#$ score out of 10”.  He could not be more right. Again, I enjoyed the East vs. West moniker, but why not just still rate every dunk and then take averages and have that serve as the decider? That would work just fine, right? America likes numbers. We don’t care that TNT can afford iPads, and only the really stoned ones watching forgot which player was in the Eastern and Western Conference. So we don’t need to vote that way. NBA taking away one of the key cornerstones in the dunk contest is a massive oversight. 

And of course, the judging was just the first complaint. My next one although smaller, is to please rid the event of props. I don’t need to see a “knighting” ceremony led by Shaquille O’Neal, because simply jumping over him will speak for itself. I don’t need Drake coming out with a backwards snapback, because that can arguable lose Damian Lillard a chance at winning his “Dunk Off”. DeMar DeRozen, who I feel is the leagues best dunker, declared a few years back that he would not participate in the event again until the props are dropped, and quite frankly, he is right on the money. Terrance Ross won the Dunk Contest last year, not using props. Athleticism is all we want to see as fans.

Which brings us back to the start. The slap in the face. The punch in the gut. The fact we did not get a final round. It was tragic. Fans and players alike were duped, as we all waited for the final round. The winners of the round two “challenges” were supposed to have a final round to declare the real winner. But the NBA had other plans. And we all lost.

And we all watched the Drake Sprite Commercial.

If it wouldn’t have been for such an unfortunate ending, I wouldn’t have been forced to write this, but we were all cheated. Everything the league pushes on to us is that this is a competition worth watching. Dominique said it like 55 goddamn times. But on Saturday night, the dunk contest was a waste of my time. We did not get to see who really won. John Wall was voted winner, but I’m not even sure. They never showed me a graphic. Graphics are an easy part of the business, and something should have been produced. Nick Cannon stumbled through the award ceremony with everyone in a state of confusion.

As an NBA advocate, it embarrassed me. And I hope next year, East vs. West moniker aside, they don’t short us a round of competition because nobody has time for that. This format needs to be changed. If they don’t figure it out, the precious viewers they seek will diminish, and the only savior would be finding a way for LeBron and KD to square off.  

I have confidence something will happen. I am not saying those two powerhouses will square off, but something will draw us back next year.

I  hope that something is getting graded out of 10.

May the wind be at your back,

~Andrew 

The Battle of Minnesota's Two Kevin's.

I am going to start out off my first post of the year with a huge cliché: life is full of choices. You know it (Ron Burgundy voice). Soak that little ditty in another time (Burgundy again). You probably just thought about all the choices you make on a daily basis (my voice or Ron’s if you want I guess)….”Should I eat cereal or eggs this morning?”, “Is this 3^rdcup of coffee the one that is going to make me shit?”, “Should I masturbate a 2^ndtime today?”, “Should I wear my Jordan’s or my sweet loafers?”, “Hard shell tacos or soft shell?”, and of course “Should I rock my ponytail or let my beautiful hair flow?”.  All of these decisions prove crucial, as they will dictate how the day will ultimately unfold, and of course, there are an array of other decisions that do not get addressed.

I would like to think that I am a forward thinker. Recently, I had a day dream that I am sure will become a reality. I figure soon enough[1]holograms will be able to look so real, that we will be able to go to any event, from any situation, simulated live in front of us, with unexpected results. Let me explain more…

Youremember when “Tupac” showed up at Coachella?

Yeah, it was awesome, but it still looked a little sketchy. I like to think these holograms are going to improve in time, and probably looks even better indoors. I do not think it is out of the question to think that this technology will transfer over to sports seamlessly. Which, of course, it could end some age-old arguments.

If things progress in that field like I figure, and these things end up being REALLY REAL LOOKING, then I think that we will have the opportunity to watch a 24-year-old springy MJ against a post-accusations pissed off Kobe Bryant. It would come with a cost of course; royalties would need to be figured out. You would have to pay the original (actual) players because their talents would be being re-sold, and of course arenas and such to hold these events. But how sweet would it be to watch a game that featured MJ, Scottie, Oscar, Bill Walton, and Steve Nash against Kobe, LeBron, Bill Russell, Karl Malone and Allen Iverson? Or whatever match-up it ends up being. The possibilities are seriously endless. How can you tell me you would not pay for this in 40 years?  

Not to mention how cool this would be from a historical teaching standpoint. The “old greats” that are forgotten as generations past would be brought back to life for people to enjoy. I seriously think this could happen. Plus, everyone want to know how LeBron James stacks up against every good player in the last 60 years. 

I’m from western Wisconsin. I stay true to my state in my sports fandom. But a lot of Twin Cities’ influence infiltrated my home city. In football debates, the Cites influence can sometimes become shout-worthy. This is mainly because Green Bay Packers fans are stubborn as hell, and mostly correct, and furthermore because Minnesota Vikings fans generally lack ammo. But when it comes to Minnesota Timberwolves/Milwaukee Bucks arguments, differences are minimal, if even present at all. This is because we both generally suck. So with the Timberwolves becoming a somewhat exciting team in recent years, the NBA fans around the area have collectively cheered.

As a questioner and sports fan, I find it my duty to create some mild confrontation from time to time, even if it is in a friendly manner, seeing as that I definitely cheer for the Wolves in most games they play in. A trend that I have recently noticed is that Timberwolves fans really really go to bat for Kevin Love. Which is honorable for a number of reasons. One reason being he can grow a lumberjacks beard, and another is that he is wet from downtown. Super soaker wetness[2].

I found out this dedication by simply voicing my opinion that I think it would be smart for the team to trade Love straight up for Blake Griffin. The die-hards fly off the handle with this one. And I can understand why I guess… But why wouldn't they rather lock into at least five years of Ricky lobbing to Blake and finishing .500 or better, instead of only 2 more years of K. Love stroking lonely 3-pointers, as they struggle to go .500[3]?  Then Kevin Love would happily re-sign with the Clippers, and everyone is locked in for awhile, and we have a structure in the league. Kevin is happy back in his college town of LA, while Blake is considerably colder then he ever imagined he would be while playing in the League, but he is going to suck it up and dunk, and maybe (and hopefully) it pisses him off so much that he got traded that he becomes a high-flying Karl Malone. Then with Ricky Rubio, you could be potentially be talking about the next Stockton and Malone!!!

For some reason, potentially becoming the next Utah Jazz does not appeal to Wolves fans around here, and it kind of confuses me. That, however, was not the intention of this jargon, because what I take away from their short-sighted opinion with Kevin Love is actually the admiration they really have for him. They love the guy.

He breathed some positive air in that franchise and the fan base greatly appreciated it. They never want to see him, his beard, and his 3-ball leave town...ever. But when I noticed their dedication to him, I had to start asking the tough one.....

“Would you take Kevin Love or Kevin Garnett?”

To me the answer is easy; it’s KG all day, everyday, even though I might be scared of him. I will get to KG momentarily, but here's why it is at least honorable to want Kevin Love…Love, or as some call him, “Mr. Buttersworth[4]”, has big brass nuts. They are heavy. He has a skill set that is elite. Presently, he is scoring 26.3 points per game, which ranks second in the league. That is paired with 13.5 rebounds per game, which is tied for first with DeAndre Jordan. Only three other players boast per game averages that rank in the top ten of two of the three “big stat” categories;those being Steph Curry (23.3ppg (7^th)/9.6apg (2^nd)), LaMarcus Aldridge (23.2 points (8^th)/11.0rpg (6^th)), and DeMarcus Cousins (23.1ppg  (9^th)/ 11.4rpg (5^th)), and none of them are as substantial as ranking second in both category.  Love does certain things most guys just do not/cannot do. He stretches the floor while simultaneously rebounding everything. For his career, he averages 3.9 OFFENSIVE rebounds per game. That number, my friends, is absurd.

This season he has also started sharing better (A formidable act), averaging 4.1 assists per game. His offensive game is blossoming into uncharted territories. If he had one other consistent scorer on his team, or if Rubio would just start figuring how he is going to score in this league himself, then Love has the opportunity to end this playoff drought that Minnesotans thirst for. Not to mention, he is fantastic for the Midwestern demographic he resides in (Again he looks like a lumberjack, people around here get down with the thought of a burly lumberjack tearing up the NBA.).

But to take him before Kevin Garnett is tomfoolery.

Before I go much further, I will say that many of the people I was asking to make this decision are under the age of 22, and by and large do not remember a lot of the Big Ticket’s best years. But some of the trusted Wolves fans I talked to thankfully backed my opinion of KG’s superiority.

The really obvious first reason the choice is KG starts with the defensive end. Success in basketball almost always starts with defense. You get a lot farther, especially postseason-wise, with good defense. KG plays defense. Kevin Love does not. While no T-Wolves team in history has ever been defensively historic, it should be noted that KG’s MVP season doubled as the team’s most efficient defensive season of their short history, posting an efficiency rating below 100 for the only time, and it resulted in them going all the way to the Western Conference Finals.

While Garnett's offensive numbers neared career bests that season (averaging 24.5ppg/13.9rpg/5.0apg), his contributions on the defensive side of the ball that proved just as devastating to his opponents. He swiped the ball 1.5 times per contest, while also accumulating 2.2 blocks per game.  He was everywhere.

The snowballing of hustle stats like these are what ultimately trump Love. Love has never averaged more than one block or steal per game in any season, while KG to contrast has only came up short of averaging at least a steal and block in three of his 19 seasons. He also has been a better passer (KG:3.9apg/KL:2.2apg) for his career, and his defensive rebounding is tied with Love at eight per game. What numbers do not capture however, is voice.

Garnett's personality seems to be on par with exactly the kind of person it takes to be a great winner. An asshole. KG is a fiery asshole. One of my buddies told me they were at an open gym in the cities once at Hastings High School, and occasionally Timberwolves players would drop by and run games with them.  He relayed to me KG once berated some scrubby string bean of a 16-year-old for not securing rebounds. An NBA MVP is going to going to yell at a 16-year-old who will not even being playing competitively in two years for not securing rebounds in a June scrimmage? If you did not already guess it, I’m pretty sure KG would hate me. And I’m almost positive I would not agree with him on most things (Mainly because I don’t deal with assholes), but I am also pretty sure KG will say anything to anybody, and that is a major reason why he was the leader he was.  

I’m taking Kevin Garnett over Kevin Love because I know that when he steps on the court, he morphs into something that is so intense, I reckon his own mother does not enjoy seeing it. But it sets the tone for the team, and no one wants to be on KG’s bad side. Kevin Love just does not posses that same intense pressure to compete. He lacks the will to sacrifice for the team the way KG did.

If you need a final reason to really sway you to Kevin Garnett, it can be that his teams were much more successful. While Love is young, and will surely get his due in the league, KG dragged Minnesota to the playoffs eight times. Love is threatening to never bring them to the playoffs in his time spent there, which is now rolling through its sixth year.

When it comes to prospecting sports, there is never a right answer.  I have faith these debates will someday be put to rest with futuristic life-like holograms, but only time will tell that fantasy. And so in the meantime, sports bars and dorm rooms everywhere will have to banter on swapping opinions and defending their choices between swigs of beer, and chomps of ground beef.

But just know that if someone asks you if you would rather have Love or Garnett that you want Garnett. Everyday, and all day.

~Andrew

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[1]Anywhere between I would say 40 and 90 years.

[2]This link is specifically for the white girls that are reading!!  I don’t listen to this shit at all!!!

[3]Both versions of the team would significantly increase winning percentage if Rubio could score at all, and they had a viable second option.

[4]Okay, only I call him that.